Setting Godly Boundaries in Friendships

The Importance of Setting Boundaries

Friendships are a vital part of our lives, providing companionship, support, and joy. However, maintaining healthy friendships requires setting boundaries that reflect our values and beliefs. Setting godly boundaries in friendships ensures that our relationships are not only enjoyable but also spiritually enriching.

Not every “friend” is a friend to your marriage. Some build you up, others slowly chip away at your peace. The Bible is clear: “Bad company corrupts good morals.” (1 Corinthians 15:33). And yet, many wives struggle with knowing where to draw the line when it comes to friendships.

Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm. – Proverbs 13:20

Friendships can either pour life into your home or drain it dry. That “innocent” friend who constantly complains about her husband? Slowly, her words shape how you see your own. That friend who insists on pulling you into gossip and drama? She’s sowing seeds of discord. Wisdom means recognising the difference between friendships that sharpen your faith and those that sabotage it.

Boundaries aren’t about being harsh; they’re about protecting what God has entrusted to you — your marriage, your peace, and your walk with Him.

Understanding What Boundaries Are

Ask yourself: Does this friendship push me closer to Christ and my husband, or pull me away? If the answer stings, it may be time for a boundary. Start small — less time, less emotional investment — and watch how your spirit feels lighter.

When we understand what boundaries are, we can communicate our limits clearly to our friends. This clarity helps in preventing unnecessary hurt or resentment and fosters a mutual respect for each other's needs.

Setting Boundaries with Love

Setting godly boundaries isn't about building walls to shut people out; it's about creating a space where love and respect can flourish. Approach these conversations with prayer and seek wisdom from God to express your needs lovingly and assertively.

Consider Jesus' example in the Bible. He set clear boundaries with his disciples and the people around him, yet always acted with compassion and kindness. Emulate His approach by being firm but gentle when communicating your boundaries.

Practical Steps to Establish Boundaries

Here are some practical steps to help you set godly boundaries in your friendships:

• Pray for Guidance: Ask God for wisdom in establishing boundaries that honour Him and strengthen your relationships.
• Communicate Clearly: Be honest with your friends about your limits and expectations.
• Stay Consistent: Ensure that your actions align with the boundaries you've set, and be consistent in upholding them.

Respecting Others' Boundaries

Just as you set boundaries for yourself, it’s important to respect the boundaries of others. Acknowledge and honour your friends’ limits, which will contribute to a healthier and more balanced relationship.

Remember that respecting others' boundaries is a reflection of your respect for them as individuals. It demonstrates love, maturity, and understanding, which are essential components of any godly relationship.

The Role of Forgiveness

Even with the best intentions, boundaries can sometimes be crossed. When this happens, forgiveness plays a crucial role in maintaining a godly friendship. Be ready to forgive others when they make mistakes and seek forgiveness when you err.

By fostering an environment of grace and understanding, you can navigate the complexities of friendships while staying aligned with your faith.

In the Wise Wives community, we talk honestly about how to spot red flags in friendships and how to build a circle that honours God and your marriage.

Download our free checklist: “The Wise Wife’s Guide to Healthy Friendships” and start drawing boundaries with wisdom today. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1FPBDxGTHzOkpH5qSsspbtNJNGBfd8YBX/view?usp=drivesdk